Wednesday, November 12, 2008

Fast Times in the ER (well not really....)

Early this morning my lovely 5.5 month old daughter looked at me and projectile vomited on me twice. While changing the sheets her majesty yakked again. By vomit #3 there was bile and I was frantically looking on the internet at webMD to determine how serious these events were. Serious for the clothes as I am sure bile stains - but more importantly were we off for our first ER visit?

While researching Ev yakked agin - very sad to see an infant throw up bile. Again and again and again. Trying to wade through the google hits was painful too - most of the articles that were found talked about vomiting in 5 month old dogs (dashuhounds seem to be especially prone - beware).

Finally decide to ditch the web search (somewhere between puke 5 & 6) and call the nurses line. I know what they are going to say even before the words leave their mouths. I have never called them and not had the same CYA response. You need to see a doctor within 12 hours or my personal favourite you need to go NOW.

So then the decision. My gut is saying BCCH because we have a history there and there is little chance of a drug addict walking into the waiting room asking for spare change. But it is 2:30am by this point and HWSNBN has voted for SMH. He toddles back to bed to wait for the call and I pack up the van with babe. Who has yakked again in her car seat.

The ER is surprisingly quiet. I thought that maybe with the stat some people would be tying one on. I was fully prepared to turn around and book to BCCH. We triaged and waited with 2 homeless people in the waiting room. One was passed out and the other commented how cute Ev was (she was sleeping). But the comment was followed by some high pitched preaching about God so all the warm fuzzies that I take from those compliments was washed away and replaced with a desire to sit as far away as possible.

Finally we are called back to the peds section of the ER. Admitted. Yakking ensues. More bile with time with foam. Nurse goes to tend to stupid 17 year old who doesn't want to sign consent to get her appendix taken out - even though she is becoming toxic. Almost removed her and signed the consent myself just to get closer to having a pediatricians attention. Stupid girl eventually concedes that she does not want to die in a cess pool of toxic shock and is wheeled away.

But then the nurse starts to comment that WADE the pediatrician has not been by her ward all shift (he didn't even come to see 'too stupid to live' again because he had seen her earlier in the day and she was now in the hands of the surgeon). So I slept in a chair with my head on Ev's crib mattress. For about 15 minutes before asthma baby started to wail. Again thought about removing him from his incompetent mother and placing with other care provider who would actually remember his nebulizer the next time they went to visit rellies with cats. Thankfully Ev slept for a few hours.

Mercifully WADE went off shift at 7am without showing his fizzog and Dr. Chung arrived and saved the day with some Gravol and a syringe of water. Nurse Courtney (no not my sister but another equally charming Courtney) administered first Gravol and syringed water. Babe slept. Took 3 ccs more of water without yakking. Sent home at 9am to sleep it off. Probably a stomach bug. Why couldn't WADE have taken the 10 minutes to to that at 4am??? If I ever find WADE I am going to make him scrub out bile stains from Ev's clothes until he cries.

So the morale of the story is - go to BCCH. Even if your kid only has an infected hangnail. Otherwise you could wait a whole shift for WADE to make an appearance. At least at BCCH you can wait in peace without hiding your purse and constantly worrying about the public toilet.

ACK! Now onto tackling the stains from last night.

Monday, November 10, 2008

Gymboree, I love you

I must confess to becoming an insane person when it comes to shopping for the Ev.

And really only one store rings my bell these days (an honorable mention to the Gap as I adore their denim jeans & can always find something for the little men). It is Gymboree. And the reason why I love them so much is multi layered.

I don't always like shopping in their stores. The one in Bellingham is a bit scungy and the two close to me in Metrotown & Oakridge aren't really close at all. But I hold my nose and go into the stores to spend my Gymbucks - even though you can't reasonably shop with a stroller in there. I usually find several great deals and even complete sets that I thought were sold out on the website.

But what really gets me hooked is the brilliant marketing strategy. The multiple lines of clothing. The discounts. The random flipping through Cookie magazine a few weeks ago was a jack pot as there was a coupon for 20% your total bill. So I bought 8 items from a line that I had been watching. It was already 60% off. So I got 80% off! Fabulous.

And just recently I went on the website again and got multiple items and had another coupon for 30% off my total bill. I am honestly all a twitter thinking of all the money I have saved and all the great deals. Even with the dollar doing a nose dive I still feel good about these purchases.

I shouldn't be surprised. I was out shopping for Everly 5 days after my c section. That is major surgery. And there I was popping Advils and asking if a certain dress came in a 0 - 3 month size. Crazy. Maybe I need a support group.... but only if they share their coupons....

Monday, November 3, 2008

Made In China

A few weeks ago the kids and I were watching a show about the human body. They were excited about all the mucus and poop and whatnot. And of course there was the obligatory discussion about private parts. Boys have penises and girls have vaginas. Only when asked the kids shouted out that girls had chinas. Despite repetition to the point of boredom the kids were still affected by the speech impediment. Whatever.

But last night when I was sorting out the kids candy they asked me what I was doing. I explained that I was making sure that they didn't get any treats made in China. Both boys looked at me with the strangest expressions. Finally Linden asks the obvious - Do chinas really make candy?

It took me a few seconds to see where he was coming from. And then a few more seconds before I could stop laughing.

The moral of the story is this - always make sure your kids can pronounce important words correctly. Otherwise they may grow up to think that chinas really are magical.

Sunday, November 2, 2008

Ebay and other dying hobbies

Well the plunging dollar has left me bereft with grief. For over a year I was enthusiastically buying and trading item from the US. I bought a new stroller for Everly (1/2 of the canadian price with free shipping!), a trip to Disneyland (dollar was over 1.10 us!), one black friday shopping trip with the intrepid Jackie, and many many ebay finds.

But now I am still addicted to the shops known as Ebay & Target - however my shopping high now leaves me feeling a little bit blue. And now there is far more math involved. I was so shocked into reality last week when I purchased something and the dollar was listed at 77 cents! Gasp! That is like mid 1990s!

I again made the trek down to Bellis Fair today. But this time it was to pick up a vacuum cleaner for my mom and it was still 1/2 price even with the exchange. But it didn't feel the same. Instead of gleefully telling the border guard my total, I did so today with me head hung low.

It's just not the same. But I will still shop online - whether through Canadian shops or American because you just can't beat the selection (ever tried to find a Jimmy Neutron DVD here?).

Plus there is a sale at Gymboree on the 6th - 30% off your order. A good shopper can't be kept down. Maybe I am the saviour the American economy needs? Super Tassi!

Saturday, November 1, 2008

Wool - and other fabrics on the do not buy list

I was given a few gift certificates for The Gap for my birthday this year.

I dutifully went and vowed to spend the moola on me and not the kids (honestly a difficult challenge as I am always scouring the racks for great deals on clothes for the monkeys).

I couldn't really find anything that was a great find (style & dollar wise) so I settled on a creamy cardigan with a loose knit texture and big creamy buttons. It was much more expensive than I usually spend on a sweater from the Gap - but it was being financed by someone other than me (mother & brother & sister). So I splurged and bought the sweater.

Day in and day out I dodge toxic chemicals and bio hazard wastes. From permanent markers (for the love of all things alive who puts these markers with kids colouring books!! Flayed alive I tell you when I find the person putting these packages together!) to poop to throw up - it is all a part of my daily life. Understandably I have not bought anything wool or silk for years. Everything
I own needs to be absorbent (who knows when you are going to have to catch a boogie nose at the playground), durable and above all else washable.

Of course the creamy sweater stays pristine for about 1 week (miracle) but it is ambushed by a green felt marker in the end. Before putting it in the wash I clipped off that annoying square patch on the inside and read the washing instructions. It said hand wash in cold water. I usually take that to mean 'delicate' cycle on the washing machine. No harm no foul with the rule so far. In the sweater goes with the rest of the whites.

And out it comes - Eloise size!! Imagine my horror. My beautiful large loopy sweater now all tightly bound into size 6x.

Turns out said sweater was made of 100% wool. I should have been a bit more curious about the hand wash direction. But it was made in China (don't get my started - I know that I broke one of my own rules) and I figured that the best it could be would be a wool / cotton / rayon hybrid. But no. They went all out and made something nice in 100% wool!

HWSNBN thought that I should take it back to the Gap. But even I could se through my anger (self directed) that this was not the fault of the chipper staff at the Gap.

But I do have some advice for the Gap as it seems that they are starting to market to my demographic again (super moms looking for something stylish but not skanky). If we are in fact their new market & they want to respect the toxic to clothes atmosphere we work in - then maybe they should consider housing the fantastically shrinkable clothes in the back of the store. Similar to the porn huts at your local Blockbuster. That way we would know by visual cue that we were about to venture into fantasyland......